If there is any doubt that America is no longer the innovative
country that it once was, we need look no further than the Czech
Republic for the latest (and amazing!) idea that certainly should have
happened here in the U.S. first. This is the kind of thing Americans
used to be good at. And then came President Obama (Bless His Holy Name).
As the Australian reports, "....commuters looking for love will soon be able to try their luck at
romance in designated dating cars.....The Prague "Love Train", which will promote a laissez-faire approach
rather than strict speed-dating rules, is due to launch at the end of
the year."
Of course, in America,we can't have a train
just for male/female singles. We have to have a separate trains broken
down by racial groups, the LGBTs, and trains for those who have no idea
if they are male or female despite what anatomical parts they came with
at birth. We need trains for different religions, single parents, and
any other social group you can think of, because, in America, we can't
have anything as simple as a "singles train." It must--simply must--be
made as complicated as possible so that no ethnic, social, or any other
kind of demographic group feels left out. In America, when people feel
let out, they start crying; when crybabies let the waterworks start,
they usually call lawyers, and then the party is over.
We
need a special committee to take ten years to decide the size of the
train, the shape of the seats, the color scheme; we need background
checks and Internet profiles on everybody who steps aboard the train,
because you never know when some creep might come aboard and if he or
she rapes somebody we gotta have an Internet profile to consult. We need
a special license for the train operators--and those operators cannot
be married less all the singles on the train get envious and start
crying, because singles are fragile that way--and anybody who cleans the
trains after the commute must be single, too, for the same reason.
That's how we do it in the United States now. It started long before Obama (Bless His Holy Name), but it's getting worse now.
In
the Czech Republic? The spokesman for the company in charge of the
project said, according to the newspaper, that "the company [is] now
deciding which of a train's five cars would be most suitable, the number
of trains to include and what kind of signage to display...The carriage
will be marked, and there will be information on the platform and
inside the carriage, in foreign languages too."
The Czechs favor the simple approach.
Excuse me while I update my passport.
ABOUT: Brian Drake is the author of The Rogue Gentleman. His audio commentaries will soon air on RadioSlot.Com. Follow him on Twitter @BrianDrake75
No comments:
Post a Comment